How do you handle a divorcing woman client who’s uncooperative?
Julie Kern, CPA, CFP®, CDFA®
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In this issue:
- How do you handle a divorcing woman client who’s uncooperative?
- Settlement Assurance Review
- AFI service
How do you handle a divorcing woman client who’s uncooperative?
Let me be candid: As an attorney, you deal with divorce every day. There’s likely little you haven’t seen.
As for me, I’m a CPA, a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER® professional, and a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® professional. And I deal with divorce every day, too. But I deal with it from the financial side, helping attorneys just like you, by helping their clients.
You and I both know that divorcing women can make for difficult clients. That said, my professional situation (details in a minute) often gives me more leeway and tools to deal with difficult clients than you do. And there are simply some nuances that I’m very attuned to, since I’m not just a woman myself. I’m also divorced.
Different personalities, different behaviors
I’ve had clients—affluent women amid divorce—who bring very strong personalities to the case. I’m sure you know the type. When confronted with news they don’t like—such as practically any email they might get from you!—they’ll have a tendency to shut down. Their tacit “I believe I already answered that! ” doesn’t exactly help you.
Or me. There’s a lot of spiteful behavior out there, too. I recently had a client who purposely opted to pay more taxes just to spite her spouse! (The detail: They both would have saved, had they filed jointly. But she wanted to punish him, and so filed separately, forcing him to do the same. Her “logic” went like this: “He controlled me throughout our years of marriage. So I’m gonna control him during this divorce.”)
Then there are the women on the other side of the fence: The more submissive types who simply shut down; many of these women would prefer not to be divorcing in the first place. It’s really hard for them to push themselves to do the things needed to move things forward.
And the crazy part? You can see both the spiteful and submissive behaviors, in turn, from the exact same woman. It’s because divorce is a grieving process (remember “Anger, denial, bargaining, depression, and acceptance?”), and that process is hardly linear. And I’m loath to bring it up, but sometimes alcohol or other substances enter into the equation, and you’ve got a client who thinks they’re being lucid when they’re not.
How this hurts attorneys—and how I can help
You can’t earn billable hours for hand-holding, coddling, or holding up boxes of tissues. You want to keep your case-load moving forward; even more motivating are court-imposed deadlines to which you must comply—forcing you to exert even more pressure on your divorcing-women clients. It’s a fairly vicious cycle.
How I can help: I have more capacity for this kind of work. And I can de-escalate the situation, because part of my job is not just helping the woman with her financial situation during the divorce itself, but for her post-divorce future. I get them looking in that direction—helping them craft a plan for their all-new lifestyle—and so end up with a less-stressed client for you. Everyone wins, quite literally.
Contact me today and let’s make those difficult clients a little less difficult.
Settlement Assurance Review
For every time you’ve been faced with a complex case—such as one with a lump-sum spousal-maintenance payout, or a complicated asset mix with hidden tax implications—and told your client, “You should talk to your tax or financial advisor,” I have a new service for them… and you.
It’s simple. When you and your client are considering a settlement, I can review it from a financial-expert perspective, for a nominal fee, and “bless it” (or not) before you go to court or mediation. The Settlement Assurance Review scrutinizes your client’s divorce settlement terms before finalization, providing:
- Equitability analysis: A detailed evaluation to ensure the proposed settlement terms are fair and well-balanced.
- Tax impact assessment: Identification and explanation of any potential negative tax implications.
- Risk mitigation review: Detection of any hidden financial risks or liabilities that could impact your client’s financial well-being, post-divorce.
During these reviews, I often discover hidden negative tax implications and other undesirable outcomes and risks that would be detrimental to your client. This can significantly reduce your liability exposure, while giving your client added confidence, and making you look even better in the process!
By partnering with us, you can confidently assure your clients that their financial interests are fully protected and their settlements optimized for both fairness and financial clarity.
Contact me and I can help you easily get your clients started with this.
AFI service
Seeing how often improperly-completed AFIs can frustrate attorneys like you, I’ve created an all-new service: I’ll help your divorcing-women clients complete their AFI, within one week of getting the supporting documents (bank and credit-card statements, etc.). And I’ll do it for them for a flat fee of just $495.
So they—and you—will have a good, solid AFI that opposing counsel can’t poke holes in, for a flat fee, in fast time.
Contact me today to get started!
